I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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