I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
