This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
