I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
