no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
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You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
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she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped