Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize