i just wanna soil my oats bro
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
Randomize
