remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Randomize
