But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
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