She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
