Texts From Last Night

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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?

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  (413): Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go? http://tfl.nu/lxh6
  Replies (32) Good night (4741) Bad night (855)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.

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  (248): I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk. http://tfl.nu/wafm
  Replies (15) Good night (5226) Bad night (1029)
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  (586): View more from Michigan

  so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside

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  (586): so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside http://tfl.nu/qiju
  Replies (4) Good night (3194) Bad night (1243)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.

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  (602): I am NOT getting arrested in a wig. http://tfl.nu/5nul
  Replies (15) Good night (2571) Bad night (983)
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  (931): View more from Tennessee

  How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.

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  (931): How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you. http://tfl.nu/giys
  Replies (7) Good night (3326) Bad night (1152)
• Favorite

  (231): View more from Michigan

  You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches

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  (231): You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches http://tfl.nu/iwei
  Replies (4) Good night (1554) Bad night (1191)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?

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  (+61): I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above? http://tfl.nu/c1r4
  Replies (7) Good night (1973) Bad night (697)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer

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  (508): He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer http://tfl.nu/btvn
  Replies (5) Good night (770) Bad night (2653)
• Favorite

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."

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  (423): He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.." http://tfl.nu/dapq
  Replies (10) Good night (2621) Bad night (1370)
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.

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  (307): While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus. http://tfl.nu/hrmm
  Replies (5) Good night (962) Bad night (350)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.

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  (303): Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now. http://tfl.nu/crnu
  Replies (2) Good night (347) Bad night (1041)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.

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  (304): We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow. http://tfl.nu/lf7j
  Replies (7) Good night (591) Bad night (309)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol

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  (610): I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol http://tfl.nu/5mb9
  Replies (4) Good night (373) Bad night (741)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do

  (1-775): View more from Nevada

  So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.

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  (775): I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do (1-775): So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch. http://tfl.nu/xajs
  Replies (4) Good night (474) Bad night (226)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.

  (1-818): View more from California

  Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.

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  (818): You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible. (1-818): Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins. http://tfl.nu/2adc
  Replies (2) Good night (683) Bad night (348)

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