didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
ok i will unlock the door
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend