the day after is always just damage control
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize