I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
