on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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