I don't think brook has ever known best
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
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