Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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