So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
My day in three words: secret purse cake
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Randomize
