I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Randomize
