Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
