can u get pink eye on your cock?
is wine microwaveable?
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
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