Where is the hickey?
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
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