omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
