was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
