Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Randomize