You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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