chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Randomize