My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
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