i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I smell like Dick and happiness
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