she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
