a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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