if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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