oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
