Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
