I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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