Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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