My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
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