I could have mohawked her pubes.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
