Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize