Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
