She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
