OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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