I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Randomize
