return my video game
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
