Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
