Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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