And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
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