the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
