He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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