gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
