I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Randomize
