My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Randomize
